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Chapter 0118
Chapter 0118
Ella POV
Things happened quickly–one second, Alexander’s lips brushed lightly against mine, and the next, I was pinned to the couch, his body straddling mine as his tongue pressed gently against my mouth.
My lips parted, allowing him to deepen the kiss, and a shiver of electricity ran down my spine.
Alexander’s hands were warm and strong as they ran down the length of my back. I gasped softly as he slipped his fingers beneath the hem of my shirt and touched my bare skin.
The contact made me shiver.
“You’re sensitive,” Alexander whispered as he pulled away from the kiss.
“Don’t tease me,” I pouted.
Alexander gripped my waist and pulled me forward until I was flush against him. “I’m not teasing,” he replied with a smirk.
“I don’t think this was part of our deal,” I said weakly.
Alexander brought his lips to mine but stopped short of kissing me. I felt his lips brush mine as he whispered, Do you want me to stop? I’ll show you to the guest room so you can handle things yourself, if you want.”
My mind raced with all the reasons we shouldn’t be doing this, a flurry of warnings flashing through my thoughts. But none of them seemed very convincing in that moment.
“No,” I answered.
Alexander closed the distance between us, pulling me onto his lap as he kissed me.
Everything else faded into the background as the heat of his body against mine took over, the warmth growing between us undeniable and nearly unbearable thanks to the drugs effects.
My hands found their way to his back, feeling the firmness of his muscles beneath my fingers, and I couldn’t stop myself from pulling him closer, as though every inch between us felt like too much distance.
For a moment, it felt as if this was the only thing that mattered, and the world outside of our kiss no longer existed.
My heart was racing as our kiss became messy and frantic. There was a sense of urgency that I blained on the drug. It wasn’t like we hadn’t kissed before. It wasn’t that any of this was new to me.
Every time Alexander’s skin touched mine, it sent a shiver through me and caused the heat between us to grow. I was distantly aware that I was making embarrassing little sounds every time he pulled away to breathe, but I couldn’t bring myself to care.
If he tried to tease me about it in the morning, I would blame the effect of the drugs, but that wasn’t truly a factor here. I was attracted to him, and I wanted this even if I wouldn’t admit it normally.
It felt like time was moving strangely. I couldn’t tell if we’d been on the couch kissing for an hour or a minute when suddenly Alexander stood, lifting me by my thighs as he did so. I held on tightly as he carried me down a side hallway.
I knew where we were going before I saw the bed coming into view.
I had a fleeting thought that I should put an end to this before we took a step in our relationship that we couldn’t
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undo, but that was the last thing I wanted.
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Despite all of the logic screaming at me that this was a mistake somehow in my heart, I knew that it was right. I knew that Alexander and I belonged together, at least at this moment. Whether that feeling lasted past the morning, I didn’t know.
Everything I had done since my second chance began was for others and this one selfish thing I wanted just for myself. Since Alexander wanted it too, why should I fight it?
Alexander sat me on the edge of the bed and looked at me questioningly.
With a surge of confidence that I didn’t normally feel, I looked into his bright eyes and pushed his suit jacket off of myself.
That seemed to be all the confirmation he needed. I yelped in surprise as Alexander jumped onto the bed, pulling me into the center of the mattress with him.
I giggled at his antics as he kissed my neck and made quick work of my skirt. My laughter turned to moans quickly as he began to undress me and let his hands wander across my skin.
Sensation overtook my mind. From that point on, all I could feel was the pleasure of Alexander’s touch. I gave into the pleasure in a way I never had before; in the darkness of his room, nothing else existed.
Our eyes locked as our bodies twined together. The intensity in his expression was almost hypnotizing. I wondered if he was feeling the same inexplicable need that was, or if it was only so intense because of the drug.
I couldn’t find my voice to ask, but it didn’t matter. Alexander looked just as wrecked as I felt, and that was answer enough.
M
His breath was coming in shuddering gasps as he pulled me impossibly closer. The pressure inside of me was building, and I knew that he was close to climax as well.
I dug my fingers into his back, urging him to keep going. Not that there was any risk he was going to stop. Alexander’s movements had become sharp and erratic.
The pressure in me reached a peak and I could feel my eyes roll back as my legs began to shake.
After a few more seconds, Alexander went still above me and then pulled his body away from mine. I immediately felt cold, but as he lay beside me, he pulled the comforter over me and put his arm around me.
We lay there for a long time, neither of us speaking a word, only listening as our breathing evened out and became calm. While he was lying with me, there was no sense of embarrassment; I was merely satisfied.
Eventually, Alexander got up and walked out of the room. He must have thought that I was asleep because he didn’t say anything as he left.
I stared at the ceiling, listening to Alexander’s soft footsteps as he moved around the apartment. Reality settled back into place, bringing with it a flood of regrets. This shouldn’t have happened. I shouldn’t have let it happen.
My life was unpredictable and dangerous at the moment, but that wasn’t the only reason this was a bad idea. For all the hatred I felt toward David, there was a time when I had truly loved him.
I had trusted him with my life, and he had betrayed me in the worst way imaginable. Even though that reality no longer existed, I had still lived through it. It had happened to me.
I wasn’t recovered from it, and I wasn’t sure I ever would be. It wasn’t fair to get involved in another relationship. I knew I wasn’t in the right headspace to allow someone else into my heart.
I wasn’t sure I could ever trust again, and it wasn’t fair to Alexander to pretend otherwise.
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We needed to talk about this. That was all we had to
do: talk and
agree that it was
a breach
of our
contract.
It was merely a way to relieve stress. It meant nothing; we were simply blowing off steam. If I repeated that
Chapter 0118
thought enough times, maybe I would start to believe it.
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